little black journal

I have been asked to do another art show at Q cafe in June, and so I’ve been spending a lot of time thinking about what my next ‘collection’ will look like. The latest sketches I’ve developed are leading me in a direction that is a bit cleaner/simpler/more hard-edged than the encaustics, utilizing much more perspectival hand drawing and architectural subject matter. I’m liking the few things I’ve rough-drafted so far, but with each piece, I’m left scratching my head, feeling like something is missing. I’m missing the depth and the richness that painting or printmaking lends itself to. In a stroke of sheer artistic fortuitous-ness, I checked Pratt’s Spring course offerings a few days ago and saw that they were offering a weekend workshop on ‘Layering in Your Prints’. I cleared my schedule, pulled my ratty, paint-spattered sweatshirt out from the back of the closet, and signed right up. I’m leaving for the studio in just a few minutes and am really excited to get back in there, after several months of being away from the printing presses and the cans of paint and the drying racks full of so much other inspring work. The class has no supply list – the only instructions I’ve been given are ‘dress for mess’. I really like the sound of that.

Sometime toward the end of last year (the day after my day-after-Thanksgiving shopping spree, maybe?), my clothes stopped fitting in my closet.  For the past 3 months, I’ve had a nice little stack of folded sweaters sitting on my dresser, unable to squeeze anything else inside my over-stuffed closet.  I did pick my prettiest sweaters to sit out, and folded them extra-neatly, and told myself they were just part of the room’s decor, but really, who was I kidding?  I just had too many clothes.  And so yesterday, unable to stand it any longer, I sprung into action and pulled every single thing out of my closet – shoes, handbags, clothes, all of it, and told myself that the only things that could be put back in there were the items that 1) fit well;  2) have been worn in the last 3-4 months (summer wear exempted).  I got an ironically-timed email from La Verne yesterday morning as I had just tossed the last pair of pants onto the bed, asking if anyone wanted to take advantage of her one-day-only 50% discount at Banana Republic.  I wavered for a moment, being someone who hates to turn down a good deal, but self-restraint won out in the end, and I decided to fore-go an afternoon of acquiring for an afternoon of de-cluttering.  I abided by a strict “When in doubt, throw it out” policy, and ended up with a pretty hefty stack of give-aways.  Eight pairs of shoes, four handbags, two coats, five skirts, a couple of pairs of pants, and roughly 15 tops will be coming soon to South Seattle’s Goodwill (with a few special things set aside for my next quarterly ladies’ clothing exchange).  Feels good to strip out some of the excess.

Closet before:

Closet after (ok, so it looks almost the same, but I promise you, there is less in there!):

The trick now will be in keeping it pared down, and so I’m going to be much more intentional about my purchases from now on – no more incidents of  “Holy Cow!  This sweater doesn’t really fit, but it’s only $13, marked down from $75!  Must get it!”.  A couple of ground rules:

1) No more black turtlenecks.  I know that black sweater/black pants is the unofficial architect’s uniform, but I really don’t need more than the four black turtlenecks I already own.

2) No more than three new items of clothing per month.  I shared this new rule with Shane and he guffawed – he hardly buys more than three new items of clothing per year.  But whatever – I like to shop, and am keeping my goals realistic.

3) Make a list of things I’d like to have, and stick to the list.  Yes, the occasional too-good-to-resist deal will pop up, and then I’ll stray from the list, but as a general rule, if I decide I have plenty of jeans, I should not shop for jeans.

Next weekend, I tackle the abyss that is my sock drawer.  And I can hardly wait.

I landed back in Seattle on Thursday night, and though it was hard to bid farewell to my temporary life of leisure, it felt good be greeted at the airport with a giant bear-hug from Shane (I needed his body heat almost as much as his affection – brrrrrr!).  And I’m extremely grateful for my suitcase full of goodies from the Coffee Mill, and my head full of memories of blazing sunsets, sandy beaches, and long chats with my lovely lady relatives.

My time in Florida was every bit the vacation I had hoped it would be.  I fell into an easy routine of a morning jog or walk with my mom; then a visit to the Coffee Mill for a caffeine fix; lunch somewhere outdoors, whether at a restaurant patio or a nearby park; an afternoon full of shopping or pool-side sitting or sipping iced lattes back at the Mill; then dinner with various extended family, followed by a sunset walk on the beach; and finally, a mellow evening at my grandma’s house, spent talking or reading or watching TV.  The weather was perfect while I was there – plenty warm to sport tank tops and sip cold Sangria with my lunch, but not the sticky, humid kind of hot that I remember from my mid-summer visits to Florida as a kid.  It felt so, so good to wake up in the morning, throw on my running clothes, and head outdoors into the fresh, sun-laden air for a jog on palm tree-lined paths.  I hadn’t realized just how much I’ve missed being outdoors until I had the chance to feel the sun on my shoulders, hear the rustle of leaves, see the multitude of greens that make up grass and plants and trees.  I also got a good dose of wildlife, as Florida is rich with all kinds of birds and lizards and turtles and snakes (ok, so seeing a snake shimmy across the path right in front of me inspired more fear than reverence, but still…).

And iced coffee after breakfast – ohhhh…I’d forgotten that coffee could be served cold.  I passed several hours at the Coffee Mill while on vacation, sipping my lattes, browsing their stock of various goodies, reading on the porch out front.  My grandma started this business when she was in her late forties, on her own, and realizing that she needed to find a way to support herself.  Thirty-five years later, through the commitment and hard work of her and my aunt, the Coffee Mill is still going strong.  I remember visiting this place as a kid, standing in front the shelves filled with candy jars, asking Grandma what I could by with the 75 cents in my pocket.  She must have given me an extra-special family discount, because I remember leaving with a good supply of gummy bears, jelly beans, and lemon drops.  This time, I was filling my basket with coffee beans and tins of tea (and maybe a little bag or two of mint chocolates and cinnamon candies).  And it turns out that Grandma still cuts me a pretty good deal.  Score!

Being so close to the water was also an extra-special treat, and I made sure that I experienced the feeling of sand between my toes whenever given the opportunity.  Everything seems more colorful when you’re at the beach, from the paint on the buildings to the color of the sunsets.  And those Gulf sunsets are really somethin’ else.  Every night was different, but they were all equally lovely.  And just when I thought the view couldn’t be more incredible, we looked out one evening and saw a group of dolphins jumping out of the water not far from the shore!  It was like a scene out of a movie.

Sunday night:

Monday night:

Tuesday night:

We spent one perfectly beachy afternoon having lunch with my aunt at John’s Pass, a cute little fishing village with restaurants and a boardwalk.  The seafood was delicious, our table in the sun was ideal for Sangria-sipping, and the pelicans were especially lively as they swooped down each time a fishing boat came in.  After lunch, we drove over to Pass-a-Grille Beach in St Pete for drinks and dessert – more sun, more beach, more mmmmm…

As much as I adored the sun and the water and the coffee, the quality time I was able to spend with family was the thing that made this whole trip worth it.  My mom and I really, really enjoyed the chance to spend so much time together just doing ‘girl stuff’ – talking, shopping, even just sitting together and reading by the pool.  And goodness, if I’d known we be spending so many hours sitting with my grandma in her living room, listening to her memories and stories and ups and downs, I would have brought a tape recorder.  Those late-night talks confirmed what I already suspected – my grandmother is indeed one of the kindest, most faithful people I have ever met.  It was so meaningful to hear her talk about how she found peace after my grandpa left after over 20 years of marriage, to hear her childhood memories of Sunday afternoon dinners shared with dozens of cousins, to see how she has been able to take every sorrow and every joy in her life and lift it up for the glory of God.  It was also nice to catch up with my aunt and my cousins – I hadn’t seen some of these family members for nearly ten years, so a reunion was long overdue.

And so, my Floridian vacation is officially over.  As I type, I am wearing my coziest pajamas and am wrapped up in my warmest blanket – Shane scolded me today for cranking the heat in our house up way too high, but I was just trying to slowly ease back into this chilly Seattle weather.  At least I now have a solid stash of gourmet teas to help keep me toasty.  And plenty of memories of sunny beaches.

I have quickly switched into vay-cay mode, and it. is. lovely. Started the day with a leisurely jog, then sipped a latte at the Coffee Mill, shopped with my mom, sat by the pool with a book, drank happy hour margaritas, watched the sun set at the beach, and am wrapping up the day with a late-night, soul-bonding chat with my mom and grandma… If the Mister weren’t back home, I might consider canceling my flight to Seattle.

After a particularly dreary week in Seattle, my mom and I boarded our plane yesterday morning and landed in tropical Florida last night. Although I love the Pacific Northwest, with its distinct seasons and chilly Winter evenings that can be spent snuggled up on the couch with my favorite blankie and a cup of tea, I was feelin’ due for some Vitamin D, ready to trade in my puffy down jacket for the cute sleeveless tops buried at the back of my closet. Looking forward to:
– Soaking up some sun, and giving even just the slightest tint to my disturbingly pale skin.
– Painting my toenails hot pink. Then actually being able to wear toe-revealing shoes.
– Catching up with my grandma, who happens to be the sweetest, kindest woman I’ve ever met.
– Ordering iced lattes from the Coffee Mill (this is the coffee/gift shop that my grandma and aunt have owned for years, and I have loads of fond memories of visiting this place as a kid).
– Staking out a perfect patch of sand on the beach, spending hours there reading, relaxing, listening to the waves wash all my worries away (how’s that for idealistic?!).

Peace out, Seattle. Try to get all that rain out of your system while I’m gone.

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about my plate. Figuratively, I mean. How big is my plate, how much stuff is on it, am I filling it too full, or failing to maximize its area? My life is in need of a minor re-org, as I’ve been feeling swamped but also unproductive, and unable to take on anything new, or even successfully maintain the relationships and activities that I already hold dear. So, I’m taking inventory…what’s on my plate, can any of it be pushed aside and fed to the dog, and what do I want/need to make room for?

Work is…work.  My job obviously consumes more hours than anything else; I am a full-time architect and have accepted the time commitments and responsibilities associated with that.  The best I can do is minimize night and weekend work, which I’m usually able to do, although duty still calls more often than I’d like for it to.  Exercise is another one of those necessary time-consumers – I’ll call those evening runs at the gym ‘eating my broccoli’. As much as I detest that treadmill, with it’s countdown clock that seems to run at about one-third of the speed of normal time, missing my work-outs puts me in a physical and emotional funk, so I just gotta suck it up and make sure they happen. Kind of like housework – I’ve just gotta do it, and as much as I hate tackling those piles of dirty laundry or that sink full of dishes, I sure am glad I made the effort once it’s done.

Then there’s the stuff on the ‘want more of it’ list, like my creative outlets – taking pictures and blogging and art-making.  I get so much satisfaction from an afternoon spent drawing in my sketchbook or putting together a good blog post, but these are some of the first things to get pinched when I’m running low on time or energy. And even when I do pretty well about keeping up with things (setting goals like my weekly sketching exercise have helped a lot), I am still left wishing there was time for more.  Maybe it will always be that way, and I should just be thankful for my creative thirst.  Then again, thirst can be irritating, exhausting, unsettling.  Not sure if/how/when to quench it.  And there’s Shane, my most favorite person in the world, who I’m always wishing I could spend more time with. If I were to assign him a place on my plate, he would be my double chocolate fudge brownie, served with a scoop of perfect vanilla gelato (if you know how much I like dessert, you will understand what a compliment this is). All in all, we do a pretty good job of being aware when there’s a lack of quality time, and making sure that we set aside an evening or a weekend to reconnect when we get off-track.  It just feels unfortunate that the disconnect has to happen in the first place.  I have several friendships that would also benefit from a bigger time investment – I want to have the kind of schedule that allows for mid-week Happy Hour meet-ups, or Saturday afternoon outings to the cafe.  Workin’ on it.  Other ‘want-more’ activities include cooking, traveling, reading, participating in neighborhood events, sewing, being more involved in our church, gardening, and staying closer in touch with family.  Phew!

I want a tapas-style life – lots of little plates of varied and balanced flavors.  I don’t want to let work be that giant serving of heavy Pasta Alfredo that doesn’t leave room for anything else.  And I don’t want to-do’s like exercise and housework to keep me from enjoying my dessert or that after-dinner glass of wine.  So…what to do?  I’m realizing that there’s not a lot (or anything) that I’m willing or able to push off my plate at the moment.  But I could make better use of the limited hours that exist in a day.  I’m going to give morning work-outs a go, to free up my evenings for other things.  And I’m going to scale back on the TV time-wasting – there’s nothing wrong with indulging in some quality veg-out time as needed, but I watched 8 episodes of Grey’s Anatomy when Shane was out of town a couple of weekends ago. That was quite possibly not the best use of an open Saturday afternoon (damn you, MacDreamy!).  So, here’s to hoping that few small steps can make a big difference.  And to promising that there will always, always be room for brownies.

(Random aside:  I made my (ok, Martha’s) mint fudge brownies today, and they are quite possibly the best thing ever.  Worth every single gooey calorie…)

And…ta-da!!!  Operation Dining-Room-Makeover is now complete.  And we’re thrilled with it – the table fits in the space perfectly, the color on the walls is bright-but-not-Whoa!, and our new blinds add a clean, crisp finish to the nook.  I’ve mixed in some new accessories (we scored that clock on the wall from a cool little shop in Bellingham last weekend) with a couple of sentimental items (the candle-holders were used in our wedding ceremony, and the vase was bought on our last trip to Paris).  I’m working on a couple of drawing/collages that might look good on the walls when they’re done, but for now, the encaustics are a good fit.  Next step: use it!  We’ve had a long-time resolution to eat more home-cooked dinners at the table, and our new cozy little nook will be good incentive to do so.

Before:

After:

The breakdown:  table: Grace dining table from West Elm;  chairs: Klismos dining chairs from West Elm;  rug: House Pet tiles in Gerbil from FLOR;  paint color: October Bronze by Valspar;  accessories: Maxie Wall Clock from Digs, Porcelain Tealight Holders and Wood Tray from West Elm;  artwork: encaustics by me.

Shane sent me an email while I was at work yesterday that said something to the effect of, “Hey, it’s supposed to be really sunny this weekend.” I quickly replied with, “Really? Time for an adventure?” Within minutes, my all-star trip planner of a husband had mapped out a perfect little Saturday jaunt. We were up early-ish this morning, and after a quick breakfast with Jack and La V at Randy’s Diner in Tukwila (imagine Denny’s, but with an even older crowd, and even bigger pancakes!), Shane and I were off to Bellingham to do a little exploring. Our first stop was Larabee State Park, for some sunshine-absorbing and sight-seeing. We shivered when we stepped out of the car and into the crisp February breezes, but decided we would still brave the cold and take the short trail down to the water. Ten minutes later, we were standing on a tiny stretch of beach with the sun glinting off the waters of the Bellingham Bay, and I knew: this was going to be a very, very good day.  We tucked ourselves into a nice little spot on a rock out of the wind and spent awhile just listening to the sound of the water, breathing in the salty air, shedding the week’s stresses and to-do’s.  It was…perfection.

Post-walk, we headed into Bellingham to check out the town.  The rest of the afternoon and evening was spent eating, shopping, drinking, drinking, eating, and shopping.  Lunch at Taco Lobo, perusing the modern wares at Digs, coffee at Woods, cocktails at Temple Bar, dinner at Tivoli, and, for good measure, a quick stop at the Tulalip outlets on the way home.  Did I mention this day was perfect?  We had a chance to really get caught up with one another after a busy week, I delved deeper into Harry Potter book 4 while sipping an exceptionally creamy latte, we found the finishing touches for our dining room make-over, I discovered a new cocktail Shane can’t wait to mix up for me at home (a variation of the Sidecar:  Cognac, Cointreau, and lemon juice, served in a glass rimmed with cinnamon and sugar), and we both ate and ate till we could eat no more.  Thanks, Bellingham, for being so good to us when we really had no idea what to expect.

There is something so satisfying about a day that is simultaneously busy and relaxing – I’m heading to bed tonight tired, but refreshed.  Amazing what a mini-adventure can do for the soul…

I have always dreamed of being one of those people that has time every morning to brew a pot of coffee and enjoy a half-grapefruit and slice of cinnamon toast while reading the paper in my plush terry bathrobe.  Instead, I am the person that flies out the door on my way to work with my tube of mascara in my pocket (to be applied while on the train) and a tangle of earrings and necklaces in hand (I have a talent for accessorizing on-the-go).  On the days when I really have things together, I remember to grab a yogurt out of the fridge and shove it in my bag before I head out.  And so I when I emerge from the lightrail tunnel and see that green and white Starbucks sign, I feel beckoned by the promise of sweet blueberry muffins or banana bread.  For both budgetary and caloric reasons, I usually resist the urge to carbo-load on these not-so-good goodies, but still, the urge is there.  So I came home yesterday and decided to one-up Starbucks with my own home-made muffins.  My own moist, flavorful, low-fat, banana-pumpkin-raisin-pecan muffins, complete with some stuff that’s actually good for you, like flax seed and wheat germ. And oh-my-gosh – these are good.  Now Shane and I have something tasty to bring to work with us for the next few mornings - I hardly even noticed the Starbucks sign on my way into the office today, knowing these little gems were tucked inside my purse.

Recipe from here, with my variations below:

Ingredients:
2 ripe bananas
2 eggs
1/3 cup canola oil
1 can pumpkin
1/3 cup honey
1/2 cup sugar
1 cup white flour
1 cup wheat flour
1/4 cup ground flax
1/4 cup wheat germ
1 tsp baking powder
1 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp salt
1/2 tsp ground cloves
1/2 tsp nutmeg
1/2 tsp allspice
1 1/2 tsp cinnamon
3/4 cup raisins
1/2 cup chopped pecans

Directions:
Preheat oven to 350°F.  Mix bananas, pumpkin, and eggs in a food processor.  Mix those wet ingredients with honey and oil.  Mix all dry ingredients.  Stir dry ingredients slowly into the wet.  Fold in raisins and pecans.  Insert paper liners into muffin pan. Fill each muffin tin 2/3 full.  Bake for 20 to 24 minutes (your house will smell like heaven on earth), or until a toothpick or knife comes out clean. Enjoy with a cup of coffee and the morning paper (set your alarm 20 minutes earlier if necessary).

After our low-key but just-right 2010 Valentines Day, spent eating cereal for dinner while watching Project Runway episodes, Shane decided to put aside our home-body-ish, old couple-ish tendencies and make reservations for us at a cozy little Seattle bistrot.  Cafe Campagne is our little slice of Paris in the Pacific Northwest, and though it lacks French-speaking waiters and a view of the Seine, it still ranks pretty high on the romance-o-meter.  We were seated at a little candle-lit table at the back of the restaurant, handed a wine list and a menu, and the rest is a euphoric blur of rich foods, bubbly champagne, and great conversation.  There was escargot, there was Chevre-topped salad, coq au vin, creme brulee, espresso, oh. mon. Dieu.  And there was talking, about travel and friends and the prospects for the 2011 Giants.  It was perfection.  So, Happy Valentine’s Day, Mr. Schnell.  Je t’aime de tout mon couer.