little black journal

37 weeks today!  I am officially full-term.  And I’ve got the beach ball belly to prove it.

Shane and I have been snapping photos throughout the pregnancy, and today was a fun look back over the past eight months.  I can remember remarking how big I was getting at week 14, when my pre-pregnant jeans became too tight to wear.  And then telling Shane at week 20 that I was really popping out.  By week 28 I couldn’t imagine how I could possibly get any bigger (silly, silly me).

And…ka-bam!

There’s a part of me that longs for the days when I can lay on my stomach again and expand my wardrobe options beyond elastic-waist pants and side-ruched tank tops.  But there’s also a part of me that will miss this big ol’ belly.  It makes a great built-in tray for bowls of ice cream and glasses of sparkling water.  It has released me from my uncomfortable instinct to suck in my stomach when I’m standing in front of a crowd or posing for a photo (trying to appear thin is obviously futile at this point).  And so many strangers have been incredibly kind, encouraging me to keep on as I huff my way around the park, telling me I look great and inquiring about the gender of the baby as they bag my groceries.  A man at the bakery told me yesterday that my pregnant silhouette was absolutely beautiful, which I’m realizing now sounds a bit inappropriate, but in the moment, it made me feel like a million bucks.  Sure, there was that teenage girl who turned to her friends when I walked past her at Jefferson Park last week and said (rather loudly), “damn, that lady was huuuuge!”, but I’m willing to let that comment slide.  After all, she’s right.  I am big.  I’m round.  And I walk a little funny.  Because hot dang, I’m having a baby in roughly three weeks!

I thought we had settled in for a stretch of quiet weekends at home. But then Jason and Nancy told us they were heading to the Hood Canal to do some camping on Friday, and although I couldn’t muster the will to spend a couple of nights sleeping on the ground, Shane and I were game for getting up early on Saturday to spend the day enjoying the great outdoors with our friends. We rolled into their campsite along the Duckabush River around 10:00 and set out with the gang for an easy hike to Murhut Falls.

Shane and J were feeling a little envious of Brian’s skin-baring tank top, so they gussied up a bit for a pre-hike photo op. These boys…

The falls were full-flowing and gorgeous. The adventurous ones among us scampered down to the base of the falls.

And then across the falls…

Jason was even bold enough to strip down and walk through the falls. I usually love seeing Shane in “play-mode” with his buddies – I could tell from a distance that he was reveling in the thrill of exploration. But man, he really tested my anxiety threshold yesterday! In between photos, I paused to pray that those rocks weren’t as slippery as they looked.

Meanwhile, Nance and I played the role of the sensible mom and mom-to-be and hung out along the trail with the kiddos, at a safe distance from any hundred-foot drop-offs. I kept my “that was dangerous” comments to a minimum when our thrill-seekers returned, but I certainly breathed a sigh of relief when we were all together again.

We spent the rest of the afternoon back at camp, lounging along the river.

Or, in Shane and Belinda’s case, in the river. Now this is how I prefer to see my husband position himself in regards to moving water…

Isaiah channeled his inner adventurer as he climbed on a fallen tree trunk.

While Stella toddled along the bank, picking up stones and tossing them in the river.

Gryffin took a quick dip in the freezing cold water (and sported a super-cool mohawk afterwards).

We circled our chairs back around the firepit in the evening, and Shane squeezed in one last bout of pre-bedtime cuddling with his best buds.

Belinda was kind enough to get the fire started a little early, so that I could indulge in one round of s’mores before we hit the road. This woman is a maniac with her fire-starting ability. Seriously impressive.

We shared a good meal together, I got my chocolate marshmallow fix, and then Shane and I pointed the trusty Civic back toward Seattle. I was a little bummed to miss out on the late-night campfire chat, but the feeling of waking up late in our own comfy bed this morning affirmed our decision to take a break from tent-time. Maybe, hopefully, fingers-crossed, we’ll be back at it next summer, mini-camper in tow.

We managed to squeeze in one last weekend getaway with the gang before settling in at home for this final stretch of waiting for the baby to arrive.  Three glorious days at an amazing house on Vashon Island with 14 of our best buds – our kid-free days are ending with a bang.

We arrived at the Vashon Lavender Farm on Friday evening, poured ourselves a couple of cold drinks, and kicked back for a weekend of eating, lounging, and laughing.

We passed hours upon hours on the house’s spacious porch that weekend – we ate our meals out there (dang, our friends know how to eat), we read books out there, we caught the morning’s rays and the evening’s view of Rainier out there.

I use the term “kid-free” lightly in reference to the weekend, as we were joined by three kiddos and three new babies (we’re in the midst of a baby boom!).  Initially I wondered whether Shane and I would be overwhelmed by the presence of so many littles, but my fretting was in vain.  I completely forgot – I’m married to the baby whisperer.  And these just happen to be some of the sweetest children on the planet.

And check out these proud poppas, with baby O (3 months old), baby N (2 months old), and baby W (one month old, napping in his little green floor cushion next to Jon).  Shane will be in good company come September.

Our all-day porch lounging was interrupted only by brief rounds of soccer or bocce ball, and a short trip to the nearby beach.  This is where I could wax poetic about the perfection of Pacific NW summers, but I think I’ve already done that on this blog.  A few times.

The lavender was free for the taking, so the ladies spent a few minutes on Sunday afternoon doing some harvesting.  It smelled a little like heaven out there.  And Jess’s lavender-infused cocktails and mocktails tasted just like summer.

We took one last stroll through the lavender field on Monday morning, pausing to soak in the sun and snap a few baby bump pics.

And then it was time to catch our ferry back to Seattle.  So long, Vashon…

We’re already making plans to return next year, with three more babies in tow.  A few of us were talking on Sunday about what it will be like in 10 or 15 years, when we’re planning these weekend getaways with our teens and pre-teens.  Will they groan at having to spend so much time with mom and dad’s friends?  Or will we need to keep an eye on any budding adolescent romances?  Will they hole up inside and play video games, or still want to throw the Frisbee around with Shane and Jason?  How will they all fit on that little green couch for the obligatory group photo?  Joking on that one.  Kind of.  I can hear it now:  “Geez, Mom, another photo?!”

Speculation aside, it’s a blessing to grow older with these people, to continuously build up our memory bank with laughter-filled meals and long talks around the firepit.  Looking forward to years more of these easy-going adventures.

Looks like I made it as far as Tuesday before pooping out…Ooof.  I’m tired tonight.  Feeling especially large.  Sick of waking up three or four times a night to the sensation that my bladder is in a vice.  I caught myself waddling in the reflection of a store window today; it’s as if my sore hips are preemptively protesting the fact that they’ll soon have to pass an 8-pound baby between them.  I tried to correct my gait, to straighten my back and move with more grace, but this took too much effort and so I went back to my belly-out pregnant shuffle, weight clumsily shifting from side to side.  I dramatically flopped down on the couch when I got home this evening, propped up my swollen feet, and wondered to myself how on earth I’ll make it through the next few weeks.  How quickly my pregnant glow has waned…  This isn’t how I wanted the final stretch to play out.

The thing is, I don’t know when or if I’ll get to do this again.  I certainly hope we’ll have a second (or maybe even third?!) shot at pregnancy, but only God knows if that’s in the cards for us.  And even if another little Schnell does someday find a home in my uterus, I’ll never feel this particular baby’s kicks again.  It will never be new like this again, I’ll never have this quiet, child-free space to focus on the life growing inside me.  My mom has told me to rest, to let the unimportant stuff take a back seat for now; I’ve responded to this advice with an uh-huh while carrying another load of laundry down the stairs.  But perhaps mother knows best.  So I slowed it down tonight, asked Shane to take care of dinner, cancelled my plans to hit the gym for a swim.  Instead I’m being still, reveling in the alien-like ripples of my belly as the baby wiggles and squirms and lets me know that all is well in-utero.  I’m taking a few minutes to rock in the glider of our nearly-complete nursery and dream about what it will be like to see our child in that empty crib.  And when I feel a foot kicking at my ribs, I’m ever so gently pushing back, telling our little one to hang tight for awhile longer, because mama really, truly loves having you in there.

I have always loved my weekends somethin’ fierce, but I’m treasuring them now more than ever.  It’s getting harder and harder these days to make it through the work week.  By Friday, I’m running on empty.  Thank goodness for a two-day chance to recharge.  Does a pregnant body good.

Shane and I have started a new kind of pre-baby “to-do” list, filled with the fun outings we want to do before baby Schnell arrives.  Topping that list was a nice dinner out with the gang, so we gathered at Hunger in Fremont on Friday night with the Chens and the Rusts for drinks and seafood and dessert.  I’ll miss these three-hour meals where we eat until we’re stuffed and laugh until we cry.  Then again, parenthood hasn’t kept our friends from a night out on the town, so perhaps we just need to start looking for babysitters now.  Oh, and they’re all pointing my way as an attempt to “include” me in the picture (always the photographer, never the photographee…).

Saturday was another gloriously sunny day, so we hopped in the car and headed north to Magnusson Park.  Despite the fact that this is one of Seattle’s largest parks, we had yet to check it out, so we spent an hour walking along the water and wandering among the trails.

Saturday afternoon was lazy – reading and naps and back porch lounging.  We packed a picnic dinner that evening and spread out a blanket on the lawn of Jefferson Park to eat olives and cheese and cherries and listen to the Giants game.  The perfection of a Seattle summer evening is not lost on us.

Saturday’s lounge-fest left me with some energy to burn today, so we went to the gym after church for a swim, and hooray!  I have found my new pregnancy work out!  Got my heart rate up and fired up my muscles, but without the achy hips and swollen hands and feet that come with long walks.  I have recently started longing for the days back when movement was easy and painless – my exhilarating runs along the lake are a distant, distant memory.  But in the pool, all this extra weight I’m carrying isn’t a burden.  And I’m more buoyant than ever!

It was another quiet afternoon at home – I spent some time in the nursery, arranging trinkets on shelves and reorganizing the closet for the umpteenth time.  This is the fun part of nesting.  The not-so-fun part comes next weekend, when we wash windows and scrub the kitchen cabinets (brace yourself, Shane!).

We caught the last of the day’s rays on our back porch, toasting to a perfect weekend with sparkling lemonade and frozen grapes.  Hallelujah – I’m refreshed, recharged, ready for the week ahead.  Realistically, I suspect I’ll be itching for another weekend by about 3 pm tomorrow, but whatever.  I’ll enjoy this Vitamin D high while it lasts.

Another summer weekend bites the dust. Literally! We headed to Poulsbo Saturday morning with the Rust clan for the World Concern Mud Run – a 5k obstacle course riddled with sloshy mud puddles, organized to raise funds for clean water projects in developing countries. Here are our fresh, clean runners, pre-race:

Mid-race:

And post-race – check out these dirt-caked studs! Crawling in the mud isn’t something Shane would typically pay to do, but he registered for the race out of a desire to channel his inner “fun guy” and support and great cause. And he embraced the event with such gusto – I’m pretty dang proud of him for stepping so far outside his comfort zone for this one.

That said, he was still given strict orders not to touch me until he’d rinsed off! Nance gave Jason the same orders, but he couldn’t resist trying to sneak in for a kiss.

The kids were a little bummed to have missed out on the run, so they staged their own mini-race once the guys were done. Gryffin was off like a bullet before I could say “Ready, set…”. He’ll be giving Shane and Jason a run for their money in the not-too-distant future!

We ate burgers on the lawn and then spent a couple of hours hanging out by the lake. Shane and Isaiah shared one of their precious buddy-buddy moments while Jason shot off the end of the monster water slide.

Sun-soaked and sleepy, Shane and I crashed for awhile when we got home, ordered pizza for dinner, and then watched the Giants beat the Diamondbacks. Pretty stellar day.

Today was Jack’s turn to show off his stuff – Shane, La V, and I headed down to Seward Park this morning to watch him crush the SeaFair triathlon. With hardly any training and a new-baby sleep schedule, he killed it! We celebrated his victory back at their house with banana bread french toast and mimosas. This whole spectator thing I’ve got going on is pretty great – no pain, all gain!

Shane and I came home and conked out again for an epic nap. Unfortunately, we both awoke feeling stuffed up and groggy – Shane is officially under the weather and I’m fearing that what I thought was allergies is actually a cold. We cancelled our afternoon plans for a visit with our newest baby friend and instead holed up inside to drink OJ and watch baseball. Felt like such a waste of a perfect summer day, but I’ll do what it takes to put myself quickly on the mend – pregnancy is tiring enough on its own these days and sick time doesn’t figure well into the packed few weeks I have left at work. Thus, I’m heading to bed early tonight (while it’s still light out!). G’night, all.

We’re in the midst of one of those sun-shiny periods when the the rain and gloom of winter (and spring, and fall…) are a distant memory and I come to believe that Seattle is in fact the happiest place on earth. I check the weather forecast and smile to myself, giddy over the long, warm days and all the good stuff that comes with them.

Because this is how we do summer:

Impromptu trips down to the lake on Saturday afternoons to play in the water and lay in the grass.

Evening walks up to Jefferson Park to watch the sun set over our city.

Hours spent lounging on the back porch, reading baby books and eating frozen grapes (my belly makes a perfect snack table these days).

Firing up the shaved ice machine after dinner, topping our fancy snow-cones with sweet milk and fresh fruit.  And maybe following this up with a coconut popsicle.  Gimme a break – I’m pregnant and it’s hot outside.

I’m considering this post a letter to my future self:  when it’s November and you’re vitamin D deficient and tired of the rain, just remember, these glorious summer months are always worth the wait.

There aren’t many aspects of the pregnancy “diet” that I begrudge – I’m not a huge sushi eater, good pasteurized cheeses are easy to come by, and the switch to decaf hasn’t bothered me at all.  I definitely miss my runny egg yolks, but Shane’s doing his best to perfect his breakfast scramble.  And then there’s that whole “no alcohol” thing…  My pre-pregnant self wasn’t a big drinker, but dang, there have been a lot of evenings lately when my mouth waters at the thought of a perfect margarita or a glass of crisp white wine – summer is a tough time of year to go dry.  So I’ve been consoling myself with an assortment of homemade fruity beverages, served in fancy glasses with citrus garnishes.  These are the chart-toppers:

Watermelon lime frosty:  Recipe found here, I skipped the agave/syrup, since the fruit is plenty sweet.  This is the best beverage I’ve made all summer – so good!  And apparently, per Shane, excellent with a shot of tequila (the whole “mocktail” concept is lost on him).

Ginger beer:  I made a super-potent ginger-lemon concentrate by running lemons and fresh ginger through the juicer, then added 3-4 tablespoons of the concentrate to a glass of sparkling water.  Spicy and tart – add a little agave nectar or Stevia for sweetness.

Fruit-infused water:  Good for those times when I want to gulp down a big glass of water after a long walk.  Add chunks of fruit and herbs to a carafe of water, muddle it a bit, and leave it in the fridge for a day or so to let the flavors sink in.  Watermelon lime is excellent; lemon mint a close second.

Fruit juice coconut creamsicles:  Not a beverage, but too good a summer treat not to mention.  Recipe found here, and I’ve been trying my own variations of juice and sliced berries.  Latest fave is cranberry-cherry juice with lime zest and blackberries.

Not going to lie, though – still very much looking forward to toasting to baby Schnell’s homecoming with a (small) glass of champagne!

It’s been a grand couple of days – heaping loads of sunshine, quality time with friends and family, a Sunday full of rest.  Glorious.

Mitch and Kathryn rolled into town with the girls on Friday afternoon.  We spent the evening on the back porch, the guys toasting to the weekend with beer and fresh oysters, the girls with bowls of ice cream.

 

We kicked off Saturday with a bakery run, and then made our way to Jefferson Park for a playground fix.  Morgan’s face absolutely lights up when she sees a swingset – she could spend all day in one of these things.  And apparently Uncle Shane loves his swing-time as well…

   

At 11 am, the water fountains came alive and the girls squealed with laughter as they raced through the spray.  Talk about unbridled summer joy.

   

We spent Saturday afternoon with friends and family at Lincoln Park, celebrating baby Schnell’s upcoming arrival.  It was all we’d hoped our baby shower would be – lots of laughter, blessings for our little one, and dinner hot off the grill, set against the backdrop of a gorgeous Seattle summer day.

(photos by Jason and La Verne)

We were spoiled with an abundance of gifts, from snot-suckers to beautiful blankets, but our favorite present by far was this personalized piece of artwork, brainstormed by Nance.  The leaves on this tree are made up of the thumbprints of the people at the shower – it will hang in baby Schnell’s room as a reminder that he or she has a huge family of people that already love him or her, people that have walked alongside us in our journey to become parents and will continue to walk with us as we cross over from waiting to raising.  I asked Shane on the car ride home last night how we managed to get so lucky, to be surrounded by people that are so full of generosity, of genuine kindness, of a willingness to cry hard with us when we need a shoulder and to laugh even harder with us when we need to let loose.  And to think that our baby will enter the world with all of these incredible people at his or her side – there may have been a happy tear or two falling behind those sunglasses of mine.

We made it home in time for baths, books, and a quick snuggle on the back porch before bed-time.  Ahhh, Morgan – kill me with your sweetness, why don’t you?

We said good-bye to Mitch and his family this morning, after one last run to the neighborhood playground for a go at the swings and slides.  As usual, I’m already missing those Jarrell girls like crazy.  It was fun to have them in our house for a couple of days, to see them first thing in the morning, to nap with Morgan in the afternoon, to get out and enjoy our neighborhood parks in a whole new way.

The flip side to all that fun was that it left me totally tuckered out, so I Sabbathed well today: naps, baseball, reading, Thai take-out for dinner.  I found myself wondering what life will be like when we have kiddos in our house that don’t leave on Sunday mornings.  But then I rolled over on the couch and went back to sleep.  We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it.

Happy Fourth, indeed.  I love me a mid-week holiday, and we made this one count.  Shane met up with the guys early this morning for a bike ride and run, and I enjoyed a leisurely morning at home, doing a little baking and catching up on the latest Princess Kate news via the Today Show (have you ever seen a smaller 9-month baby bump?!).  Shane came home around 10 and we and drove over to Jason and Nancy’s for a brunch bonanza – mimosas (gosh, I miss champagne…), breakfast sandwiches, and several hours of doting on Jack and La Verne’s sweet baby Nico.  Shane can be pretty intimidated by the fragility of newborns, but once he was finally coaxed into taking the baby in his arms, his fears waned as his heart-strings were tugged.  That’s one crazy-adorable little boy.

Shane has been complaining lately about his limited wardrobe, and I had a Banana Republic coupon I couldn’t bear to waste, so we headed to the outlets in the afternoon to get my man some new duds.  He scored big – one pair of jeans, two button-downs, and four t-shirts for $120!  I seriously lamented the fact that they don’t have a maternity section.  Although technically, I suppose I could be wearing Shane’s clothes these days – I’m quickly closing the weight gap between us!

After an impromptu test drive of a Prius V at the Toyota dealership (we were in the new car market for all of 45 minutes, but that quickly passed) I spent the evening working on our nursery mural.  Per my typical overly-ambitious tendencies, I grossly underestimated the amount of time this project would take, but it’s nearly done and it looks good.  Our kid better like gray and white.

Shane made tacos for dinner and I sighed a contented sigh as I put my feet up, propped my plate on my (festively clothed!) belly, and gave thanks for good friends, for good food, for a blessed day off.  Happy Independence Day, folks.