little black journal

The initial news of the disastrous earthquake in Haiti shook me – I was mortified by the magnitude of the destruction of both life and property and used TV and the Internet to keep myself as up-to-date as possible on the quake’s damage.  And then, without really realizing it, I began to distance myself from the gruesome images and horrific stories.  I wrote my check to the Red Cross, I said a prayer for the people of Haiti, and I subconsciously tucked the tragedy away in that corner of my heart reserved for seemingly hopeless cases.  My apathetic attitude came to light tonight and I knew that I should re-inform myself.  I started with a 60 Minutes segment on the latest activity in Port-au-Prince.  Tears streamed down my face as I watched bull-dozers dump piles of bodies into trucks headed for mass graves.  A child’s leg was amputated with an old hacksaw, for lack of decent medical supplies.  A swollen and bloody man was pulled from a pile of rubble after four days of being trapped among the ruins of a concrete building.  Absolutely gut-wrenching.  I set my computer aside, buried my face in my pillow, and cried.

I don’t mind shedding tears, if that’s the price I pay for being more well-informed.  I don’t mind donating money, encouraging my co-workers and friends to do the same, posting ‘pray for Haiti’ messages on Facebook.  But none of these things are going to return a lost child to the arms of her dead parents, or reunite a crushed and broken family.  My money, my sadness, and even my prayers feel so insignificant in the face of such loss.  And so, like so many people around the world, I see a glimpse of just how bad things are in the wake of this disaster, and I am called to…???  God, I wish I knew how to fill in that blank.

photo from here.