We’ve made a tradition of writing down our New Years resolutions and tucking them into our Christmas stockings, to be pulled out at the end of the year for a check-in. By the time December rolls around we have only a faint memory of what goals we actually set, which means there’s an element of surprise when we unfold the lists we made 12 months earlier. There are usually a couple of resolutions kept, a couple of shrugs over resolutions forgotten and unachieved. And I’m ok with it this way – Schnell resolution-ing comes with a heaping load of grace. We’ve accepted that it’s only the things we really want to do and really have time for that will bubble to the surface.
That said, even if we’re ultimately just gonna do what we’re gonna do, I still like this practice of taking stock and intention-setting. I like having this record of evolving dreams and priorities. I especially love hearing what comes to mind when I ask Juliette what she wants to do in the year ahead (“Go swimming a lot! Snuggle with Mommy more! Play cards!â€). Here’s my 2020 hopeful look-ahead:
Re-strike the work/life balance. I’ve mentioned a few times how all-consuming my job has been lately and I’m ready to pump the brakes. I’ll keep my laser-focus during office hours, I’ll work the occasional evening when duty calls, but I’m Trying (capital T!) to do away with work being the last thing I think about as I drift off to sleep and the first thing I think about when I wake in the morning. Most of that late night pondering/worrying is completely unproductive, anyway – I have yet to experience a midnight epiphany that solves a budget crisis or gets a much-needed building permit. So I’m going to limit the off-hours email-checking, bite the bullet and officially work Fridays again (I’d rather work on Friday while Juliette’s at school than work every evening after bedtime), and leave work at work. Just think of the time and energy this will free up for me! So I can…
Make art. Sometimes with Juliette. I’ve largely been on an art-making hiatus since Juliette was born – most of my creative energy (when I have it) and time (when I have it) has gone toward taking photos and keeping this blog current. But I miss my sketchbook. I miss the print-making studio. I miss using my hands to MAKE. I’m still putting together the framework for this one, but have a book of drawing prompts that Juliette and I have pulled out a couple of times on quiet evenings at home and the hour we spent doodling different bumblebees was incredibly satisfying.
Bang out at least five home improvement projects. When we bought our 1950’s house a year and a half ago, we immediately put together a list of 30 projects we wanted to complete over the next few years. I hopped to it and rolled A LOT of white paint onto our walls when we first moved in. We fixed a leaky faucet, replaced our upstairs windows, got new gutters, cleaned up the yard, and then we…fizzled. Transitioned into maintenance mode. But I’m getting my second wind, ready to bid farewell to our pink toilets. Eager to give our basement some love. Eyeing a couple of unsightly shrubs that have gotta go. Just typing out this list makes me giddy – home makeover round 2 starts NOW.
Play more board games. Shane and I went out for a date-night/game-night during the holidays at a local game shop and I as I looked around at the small groups of people huddled around us, I was struck by how engaged they all were. No one was checking their phones or sitting on the fringes. People were laughing over their Cards Against Humanity or agonizing over their next move in Settlers of Catan and I thought, we should all do this more often. Playing games forces a focused interaction that I feel like I’m lacking – with Shane, with Juliette, with friends…I hereby deem 2020 the Year of Qwirkle.
And I always include at least one warm-and-fuzzy self-care resolution that tends to fall by the wayside by mid-February, so in that tradition I’m committing to move with intention for at least 10 minutes EVERY DAY. Take a moment before bed to breathe and to stretch. Bring back the lunchtime walks. Do Barre again. On the very best of days, cross-country ski!
Cheers to a year of aspiration. And so much grace.
(a 2020 Mama-Jules collaboration…)